"So tell me, what is it that you plan to do/ with your one wild and precious life?"
--Mary Oliver

Friday, February 27, 2009

friday five: the fork in the road

This week's Friday Five come courtesy of Singing Owl from RevGalBlogPals. She writes:

Friday, February 27, 2009

Friday Five: The Fork in the Road

"I am at a life-changing juncture. I do not know which way I will go, but I have been thinking about the times, people and events that changed my life (for good or ill) in significant ways. For today's Friday Five, share with us five "fork-in-the-road" events, or persons, or choices. And how did life change after these forks in the road?"

Okay, Singing Owl, here are my five forks in the road:

1. I didn't have a lot of say in this one, being five weeks old at the time, but the first big fork in my road came when I was adopted by Millie and Leonard Resch on October 24, 1968. It turned out to be a 38-year-long love story, lasting until my mom's death in 2007. I could not have been more blessed, both by the mom and dad who loved me and raised me, and the mom who loved me so much she was willing to give me up. I love all three of them, my wonderful parents, more than words can express.

2. At 19 I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and clinical depression. This led to years of therapy and, even more important, much painful soul-searching, trying to figure out where God was speaking to me in my suffering. And I found out that not only was he there, he was holding me, lovingly, and feeling my pain as his own.

3. At 27 I did a unit of C.P.E. (Clinical Pastoral Education), which is, basically, an intensive chaplaincy internship. It's impossible to sum up in only a few sentences what that summer meant for the rest of my life...suffice it to say, I fell in love with the work, am finally back in grad school (after years of struggling with fibromyalgia), and hope to work as a hospice chaplain once I get my degree.

4. When I was 32 I met my husband through mutual friends at the Basilica of St. Mary. Can you say instant lightning? We've been married for five years and he's my rock, the light of my life, and on many days, especially when my depression is bad, the reason I get out of bed. Our marriage tells me a lot about God's love for us--steadfast, constant, always forgiving. We want to adopt so we can share the love with which we've been graced with a special child.

5. Two years ago in April my beloved mom died of emphysema. I am still so lonely for her. But in the midst of her dying, she taught me, by example, what it means to have lived a good life, and what it means, for a person of faith, to go to meet her Creator. (Check out "top ten things I learned from my mother" under "select posts" near the top of the right-hand sidebar.)

Come on ladies, play along with me! Either on your own blogs, or in the comments box. :)


Auntie Knickers said...

Excellent play, and looking at last week's FF I see you also got a pet from Pet Haven! Hope you're dealing with the snow in true Minnesota fashion.

Michele Rosenthal said...

I'll take a stab at the game:

1. the day I was admitted to the hospital and my trauma began - I could choose to fight to live or give in.

2. the day I was released from the hospital and I had to choose to define myself as a survivor or as something that did not entirely pigeonhole me that way.

3. the day 4 years later I realized I had gone the survivor route and could see myself no other way -- and I gave in to that.

4. the day 20 years later I realized my entire life was driven by the fear of a survivor and I could either continue to be that way or find a way to heal.

5. the day I finally became healed and realized I could spend my life moving forward without looking back, or use what happened in the past to help other people not suffer in the future.

Singing Owl said...

You are one amazing woman! Reading your sidebar and now your F.F. answers is very moving. I'm so glad you found a wonderful man to share life with. Thank you so much for playing. Continued blessings, clarity, strength and love to you!

Roxane B. Salonen said...

Barbara, very nice reflections on the sufferings and joys of life. Thank you. I feel honored to know you! This is a good "exercise" and I think I'll take it up on my blog as well sometime soon.

Shannon said...

Hi Barbara,

I just signed up to be one of your followers after reading your post about your new widget! I thought I should introduce myself since you may be surprised to see me there.

Briefly, I was a friend of Emilie's (I knew her for a couple of years through ECFE and our play group), and I've read your blog from time to time since becoming acquainted with blogging through Emilie. I'm visiting your blog today for the first time in a while and I've noticed many changes--I like what you've done with it!

I don't post regularly on my own blog. I'm not really sure what my blog's purpose is at this point, but I do read a fews blogs faithfully, and if you don't mind, yours will be one that I keep up with.


Shannon said...

A few blogs, not a fews blogs. :)


Kristine said...

wow - what a lovely entry. I appreciate your insight on the "forks" in your life. I made me think.

Holly Rutchik said...

I so enjoyed this post! I too did my masters in theology, but then went off and got married and had 2 babies in a year. Although I have been so blessed by these things, I often wish I would not have waited to do my CPE. I so hope it is something I will return to someday. I will pray for you, your ministry and that beautiful baby out there who is ready to start a love story with you.

Maggie May said...

This is an awesomely honest blog and your writing is clean to the bone and the heart. I'm glad I read this