surprised by grace

It's amazing how often grace slips between the cracks and slides into my life when I least expect it. The other night I wrote a very bitter, angry post about my chronic pain/health issues and all of the ugly feelings I've been wrestling with lately--the loneliness, isolation, feeling completely useless and unimportant. A few hours later, I went back and deleted my post, thinking my emotions were just too ugly and intense to share. The next morning while reading my email, I discovered that someone had read and answered my post in the three hours it was up:

From one redhead to another: Been there. Before I took myself back to school at the ripe old age of-well, let's not go there, shall we?-I was stuck with no job, no car, and very much alone. If I had died it would have been weeks before anyone knew about it. You will make it. Read Isaiah 41-I don't have a Bible handy at the moment-where He says, "I will help you." Hold onto that.
I loved your 21st Century Zen. It was the only belly roll laugh I had all day! Thank you. I needed it. Good luck on getting discovered. I enjoyed reading you.

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Posted by The Wanderer to redhead-report at 7/31/2006 08:56:

This is the text from Isaiah, one that I have read many times but, for some reason have not remembered these past months:

But you, Israel, my servant,
Jacob, whom I have chosen,
descendant of Abrham my friend,
whom I have taken to myself,
from the remotest parts of the earth
and summoned from countries far away,
to whom I have said, 'You are my servant,
I have chosen you, I have not rejected you,'
do not be afraid, for I am with you;
do not be alarmed, for I am your God.
I give you strength, truly I help you,
truly I hold you firm,
with my saving right hand.

Do not be afraid, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by your name
you are mine.
Should you pass through the waters,
I shall be with you;
or through rivers,
they will not swallow you up.
Should you walk through fire,
you will not suffer,
and the flame will not burn you.
For I am Yahweh, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Saviour.
(Isaiah 41:8-10;43:1-3)

Somehow, despite the physical pain, I realize now that I'm not alone. That, indeed, I never was. All I had to do was ask, and God was there. When I least expected anyone to hear me, I was answered by grace.