"So tell me, what is it that you plan to do/ with your one wild and precious life?"
--Mary Oliver

Thursday, October 12, 2006

three years and one day

I think the nasty weather we've been having yesterday and today is my fault. It's God telling me to quit complaining about rain on my wedding day three years ago (yesterday). I have to admit, I'm actually nostalgic for the rain; at least it was warm! And of course, it was a lovely day all the way around despite the rain--I was going through our wedding pics the other day, and re-lived the whole incredible day. (We were hoping to buy a printer/scanner with the anniversary money from my mom but, of course, we couldn't find one for $50. We'll probably bite the bullet and get the $80 one--I mean, who needs groceries?!--and if/when we do, I'll post some of our pictures.)

Because of the weather, we didn't do very much; we just went to Grandma's for a yummy and warming dinner. After George went to bed I sat up and cried for a long time. If someone had asked me on our wedding day if we'd be childless three years into our marriage, I would have said NO WAY. I would have been wrong, obviously. However, I'd marry him all over again in a flash. I still can't believe I found a thoughful, caring, talented and funny guy like George to share my life with, I really can't. Snuggling together in bed yesterday morning with our coffee, the newspaper, and Fiona, I felt a wave of pure contentment wash over me, and gave thanks. (There are many moments like that. I just always seem to forget to write about them!!!)

And I've come to realize something about love: Love doesn't come to us because we deserve it, because I've never done anything to deserve the kind of love I have with George. Love comes to us just because we are, not because of what we do. It's pure grace.

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